Are we exhibiting what we want our kids to be? Call it a harsh reality but children rarely learn from what we preach, they learn from our actions. Take this for an example, an anonymous user on the internet confessed that her child would hit her younger sibling while playing. Her explanation in defence was, “We are playing ‘mommy”. We all aspire to become perfect parents for our kids because we want to inculcate values in them that would make them better human beings. But the larger and the more significant question is do we exhibit that kind of discipline in our behaviour? We expect our children to use modern-day gadgets judiciously but do we supervise our use of these products? We want our kids to watch their words and actions when angry but do we manage our anger appropriately? We want our kids to show decorum and discipline with their daily routine but are we exhibiting ourselves as an example to do the same? Dr Haim Ginott, a renowned child psychologist, pointed out, “Children are like wet cement. Whatever falls on them makes an impression.” If we give the child an environment of hostility he is more likely to learn to fight. An environment of ridicule and shame can lead to the child resulting being shy and guilty. But similarly, if the child had always lived with tolerance, he learns to become more patient. If he has always received praise, he learns the virtue of appreciation. What is important during the child’s growing years is that we model the kind of behaviour we expect our children to be. It is impossible to not be stressed or angry under circumstances. But when the parents manage their stress and anger appropriately, the message is loud and clear to the kids that it is normal to feel negative at times but it is only the positive attitude towards solving these problems that reap good results. Parents should ‘speak’ and ‘do’ what they expect out of their children. Saying statements like. “I love all kinds of food”, “I love playing outdoors”, “Let’s clean up the mess together”, “Let’s help little brother/sister with eating the food”. These kinds of statements bring about assurance in the kids and before indulging in the wrong they are forced to do what think what they have been taught. The brains of children are like sponges. They absorb everything without discriminating information into right or wrong. Let's set ourselves as better examples for our children. Let's exhibit what we want our children to be.

Are we exhibiting what we want our kids to be? Call it a harsh reality but children rarely learn from what we preach, they learn from our actions.

Children See Children Learn - The pillar of parenting

Being a positive role model for your child can help instil the right attitude and habits from an early age for your child to nurture a healthy lifestyle.

Children See Children Learn ~The pillar of parenting

Kids tend to avoid healthy food due to the high taste levels of junk food. These activities will be a great help to develop their interest in food:<ul><li>Take them for grocery shopping.</li><li>Cook and Bake with them; there is nothing more exciting than this.</li><li>Teach them gardening - grow foods in your backyard.</li><li>Place the food on the plate in the colours of a rainbow; this way you can include all sorts of food on your child's plate. The easiest way is to prepare a food salad or a vegetable salad.</li><li>Hide vegetables and fruits in an opaque box or carry bag and ask the child to close their eyes. Then ask them to put their hand inside the bag, pick up food, feel it and then try to identify the vegetable/fruit through its texture. You can do this activity separately for vegetables and fruits to make it easier for your child.</li><li>Food obstacle course activity. Design an obstacle course in your house where you place different fruits/vegetables as obstacles. The child will have to eat a small portion of that vegetable or fruit before advancing forward. You can carry out this activity in a group and it will be a lot more fun.</li><li>Weave a story around fruits and vegetables and narrate those during their mealtime; check out food-related stories on our app.</li><li>Sing them songs/rhymes about food; you can a few songs related to food on our app.</li></ul> Keep in mind:<ul><li>Do not give them screens during mealtime; this way they will know what they are eating and will appreciate the food on their plates.</li><li>Let them have their favourite snack or dessert once in a while. But do not use them as treats for eating the food that they like less.</li></ul>

Thinking of interesting ways to present food to your child(ren) will make them eat all types of food.

Activities to encourage and develop child's interest in food

Thinking of interesting ways to present food to your child(ren) will make them eat all types of food.

Activities to develop your child interest in food

Parenting is a process, not a learned behaviour. Raising a child in a nuclear family requires several measures, the most important of all being the sharing of responsibilities between both the parents equally.<ul><li>Children in a nuclear family are more confident as they are more independent compared to children raised in joint families.</li><li>A joint family offers a lot of family time, so parents in a nuclear family should properly schedule their day to assure sufficient and efficient time for kids in the family.</li><li>Being in a nuclear family brings many responsibilities on parents’ shoulders. This might drain you out, more if you are a working parent. This draining out will make you frustrated sometimes but it is very important to stay positive in front of your parents. The serious discussions can be limited to bedrooms between you and your spouse.</li><li>If you live in a nuclear family, it is important to maintain good ties with the extended family. This is because they will be at your help to look after your child when you cannot be present for your child.</li><li>Instead of relying on gadgets, invest in educational play boxes for your child which will aid your child’s intellectual development.</li><li>Involve your kids in household chores. Nothing can be a better way to spend quality time with your kids. This also develops emotional, motor, social skills in your child.</li><li>Make sure to plan outings – even to the nearest park – once in a while. This will help you ease a bit and also give your child the time to bond with you.</li></ul> In the end, it is up to parents to weigh the pros and cons of raising a child in joint and nuclear families and then decide what’s best for their child(ren).

A nuclear family or elementary family or conjugal family is essentially a family which has parents (mother and father) and children.

Parenting in a nuclear or conjugal family

A nuclear family or elementary family or conjugal family is essentially a family which has parents (mother and father) and children.

Parenting in a nuclear family

A few things said in haste messes up a child's brain and have a considerable impact psychologically, like low self-confidence, self-doubt, anxiety, depression, and so much more. Throughout your parenting journey, make sure you are not saying things or acting out in a way that could damage your child(ren) mentally. Sometimes parents are not aware that their actions affect their child(ren) negatively, and sometimes parents overlook it and justify their bad behaviour due to their stress. Here are a few practices which you should avoid telling your child(ren): Pick these up right now. I don't want you leaving a mess like that again.Instead, say:&nbsp;I don't like this mess you are leaving. Can you please clean this up when you have time? You should know better.Instead, say:&nbsp;It's OK not to know some things. Here, I will help you out. You're a bad kid.Instead, say:&nbsp;Can you tell me why you behaved/acted in such a way? I feel it wasn't right, is there anything you want to talk about? Or Else.&nbsp;Example: Eat dinner, or else you won't get your dessert.Instead, say:&nbsp;How about you take a healthy dinner quickly so that we can all enjoy dessert together?&nbsp; Stop being shy.Instead, say:&nbsp;You can come to say hi to your aunt when you are ready. You should set a good example for your brother.Instead, say:&nbsp;Your brother looks up to you; you're such a good role model. Wait until your father/mother gets home.Instead, say:&nbsp;You're grounded because you said a bad word. I will never forgive you.Instead, say:&nbsp;What you did was not acceptable, but we can look past it and move on if you think the next time. I'm ashamed of you.Instead, say:&nbsp;Although I feel bad about what you did, I love you for who you are. Don't worry; everything will be OK.Instead, say:&nbsp;Mom and Dad are always nearby, and we're going to set up a plan in case of emergency. Here, I'll do it.Instead, say:&nbsp;Let's do it together!" Don't cryInstead, say:&nbsp;I know you're sad, and it's OK to cry. It's OK to let out your emotions. Let me hug you. If you don't clean your room, you're going to be in big trouble.Instead, say:&nbsp;When your room is clean, then you may go out to play. Family finances aren't your business.Instead, say:&nbsp;Finances are how we make and manage money, and when you like, we will teach you what we know. I'm disappointed in you.Instead, say:&nbsp;I'm surprised and was not expecting this to occur. Come here, NOW.Instead, say:&nbsp;It's almost time to go. Do you want one minute or two? Because I said so.Instead, say:&nbsp;Explaining why you feel a certain way about something. We can't afford that.Instead, say:&nbsp;We're not going to buy that because we're saving our money for more important things. Don't talk to strangers.Instead, say:&nbsp;What would you do if a man you don't know offers you candy and a ride home? OR If anyone makes you feel sad, scared, or confused, you need to tell me right away. You should listen to adults.Instead, say:&nbsp;You need to listen to your parents. Don't be greedy!Instead, say:&nbsp;Would you please be kind and share your toys with your friend? Who taught you this? (about mischief)Instead, say:&nbsp;Why did you do that? Look at this lovely girl.Instead, say:&nbsp;I love you. You can do this too. I do everything for you.Instead, say:&nbsp;We do things for you because we love you, so please do for me. Do I have to tell you this 100 times?Instead, say:&nbsp;I've told you this before, but could you please. That's only for boys/girls.Instead:&nbsp;Say nothing at all. Try your best at raising gender-neutral children. You live under my roof, so you follow my rules.Instead, say:&nbsp;You know the household rules. Please stick to them. That's how I was raised.Instead, say:&nbsp;I don't think it's a good idea to do [ ]. Even my parents used to tell me that [ ]. You're just like your mother/father!Instead say:&nbsp;I’m not happy with [ ] because [ ]. I told you so.Instead, say:&nbsp;I'm sorry to hear about [ ] ... let this be a lesson. It's just a little white lie.Instead, explain to them that it's OK to use white lies to be polite and not hurt someone's feelings. Explain to them the fine line between lies and little white lies. Man up. / Be a man.Never disregard your son's feelings. Don't teach them that showing emotions is weak. To show emotions is only human. Why can't you be more like your sister?Instead, say:&nbsp;I don't quite like this behaviour of yours. Do you think we can work on it? If you loved me, you wouldn't do (this/that).Don't teach them that love needs to be proven all the time. Love comes without ifs and buts. I wish you'd never been born. / I hate you.No matter how angry you are, this is the worst thing to say. You would be scarring your child. Why can't you do anything right?Instead, say: What's the barrier? Is there anything I can help you with? I don't believe you.Instead, say: This comes as a shock for me. But I am sure you can tell me the whole thing. There's nothing to be afraid of.Instead, say:&nbsp;Everyone has their fair share of fears. We appreciate that you shared your feelings with us. We promise we will work on this together. You're lazy/stupid/selfish.Never label your child. Never. Your friends don't do that.Comparison will never bring any positive change. Accept your child for who they are and appreciate them. You should have done better.Praise them for their achievement. Do not over expect. You don't know what you're talking about. / You're too young to know what you want.Often children know what they want or how they feel. Saying this will show your distrust in their feelings. You'll never be able to do that.Instead, encourage and push your child to do better, of course, without any comparison. You're so fat/skinny, or You're going to get fat/skinny.Never attribute a child's identity to their looks. You make me so mad.Calm your anger down, and then talk to your child(ren).&nbsp;Instead, say:&nbsp;We will talk about this after a while when I am in the right state of my mind. Impact of such phrases on children:<ol><li>Antisocial behaviour</li><li>Poor resilience</li><li>Depression</li><li>Aggression</li><li>Lack of empathy</li><li>Difficulty in relationships</li><li>Self-doubt</li><li>Lack of self-confidence</li><li>Anxiety</li></ol>

A few things said in haste messes up a child's brain and have a considerable impact psychologically, like low self-confidence, self-doubt, anxiety and so on

Speaking Gently: Things you should never say to your child

A few things said in haste messes up a child’s brain and have a huge impact psychologically.

Things You Should Never Say to Your Child

It's trickier to keep babies safe in monsoons, but taking care of a few important things can make it alright: <ul><li>Make sure that your baby’s clothes are dry and warm. Clothes often remain cold and damp after a wash in the monsoon. Clothes that remain damp can result in your baby catching a fever or cold. It is also best to opt for breathable cotton fabrics and avoid synthetics that may cause rashes.</li><li>Monsoons are always accompanied by several insects and germs like flies, fungus mosquitoes, etc. Hence the chances of babies falling ill also increase during monsoons. To keep your baby free of these, ensure that you and everyone else handling your baby should stay clean. Keep an eye out for nappy rash - change diapers regularly and apply a good diaper rash cream.</li><li>Disinfect your home and surroundings too regularly to keep germs away. Unclean surroundings can harbour many disease-causing insects and pests, as well as bacteria.</li><li>Monsoon brings with it malaria and dengue causing mosquitoes. To prevent your baby from catching these diseases, it is best to use bed nets or mesh windows. You can also use mosquito repellent creams for your baby after consulting with a doctor. There are also liquid, card and coil repellents available that are safe and effective against mosquitoes.</li><li>It is best not to take your baby out during monsoons, especially when it is raining. The humidity and the change in temperatures might lead to your baby catching the flu. If you have to take your baby out, make sure that your baby is covered correctly and completely dry throughout your outing. If you go out, avoid dirty areas with puddles and mud. Ensure that you are not taking your baby to crowded places as it’s easier to get infected with people around. When you take your child outdoors, keep wet wipes handy to ensure your baby stays clean all the time.</li><li>Some infants are allergic to specific pollen and allergens. Make sure your baby is kept away from these during the rains. If you notice any rash, redness or other symptoms, consult your doctor immediately and get it checked.</li><li>Check your house for dampness, leakage before the monsoon arrives. Get them fixed if there is a problem. Check for fungus or moulds around the house. Secure the loose electric wiring, if any. Clean the drains and keep bathrooms hygienic</li><li>Always feed freshly prepared food to your baby in monsoon as food tends to spoil quickly in monsoon.</li><li>Since you can’t always find clean water when you’re outside, make sure you carry a small bottle of sanitiser and use it to clean your hands whenever handling the baby.</li><li>Many doctors recommend getting a flu booster shot when the monsoons are around. Make sure your baby gets all his/her shots before the monsoon.</li><li>Since a baby is primary indoors in monsoon (s), he doesn’t need a daily bath. Two to three times a week, and especially around humid times, can give your baby relief from the heat as well. If your child has been outside, definitely give him a nice warm water bath.</li></ul>

Taking the right precautionary steps before the arrival of any season will keep your baby safe and healthy.

Monsoon Precautions for Babies | Tips & Precautions

Taking the right precautionary steps before the arrival of any season will keep your baby safe and healthy.

Monsoon Tips and Precautions for Babies

Ravina Sewani

The authoritarian parenting style is characterized by parental use of high levels of control behaviours and showing low levels of warmth and support. Authoritarian parents tend to be restrictive, allow little input from children, and provide little reasoning behind rules and regulations. People with this parenting style often use punishment rather than discipline. CharacteristicsThe authoritarian approach represents the most controlling style. Rather than valuing self-control and teaching children to manage their behaviours, they focus on adherence to authority. Instead of rewarding positive behaviour, feedback is in the form of punishments for misbehaviour. <ol><li>Demanding, but not responsive –&nbsp;Such parents want their kids to grow exactly the way they want. Parents have lots of set and unwritten rules for their kids and expect them to follow —even though children receive little to no explicit instruction about these "rules." Instead, children are expected to know that these rules exist.</li><li>Show no feelings or empathy -&nbsp;Parents show no feelings for their children and do not empathize with them. They do not entertain questions or make an effort to understand the child's emotions.</li><li>Little Explanation for Punishments –&nbsp;Yelling and Abusing a child is often seen in such parents, rather than explaining in the love and caring manner when the rules are broken.</li><li>Don't offer choices to children -&nbsp;Parents' approach to discipline is strictly one way. They don't discuss the rules with their children before implementing them. The kids are rarely allowed to make a choice.</li><li>Have a low tolerance for indiscipline and misbehaviour –&nbsp;Parents usually misbehave and expect their children to follow the rules with no choice.</li><li>Lack of trust in their children -&nbsp;Parents, expect high standards from their children. They do not allow them the freedom to put up their best behaviour and make choices. Instead of letting their children make choices, the parents ensure that the kids follow the instructions so that they do not commit mistakes.</li><li>Not Responding to a Child's Questions or Requests -&nbsp;Any conversations from children to their parents are irrelevant and are not met with an acknowledgement. Even when the child successfully manages to adhere to all the expectations, the feedback would still be of expecting a lot more the next time, without any praise or acknowledgement of the present achievement.</li><li>Shame their children for indiscipline -&nbsp;Parents use shame as a strategy and force their children to follow the rules by using phrases such as "Why do you always do that?" "How many times do I have to tell you the same thing?" or "Why can't you do anything right?". These parents believe that shaming them will encourage them to follow the rules.</li></ol> Effects on ChildrenThe authoritarian style of parenting affects kids in different ways. It can impact them mentally, emotionally, and socially. Below are the impacts of authoritarian parenting on Child: <ul><li>Do not learn to think independently and&nbsp;cannot make decisions.</li><li>Display more&nbsp;aggressive behaviour&nbsp;outside the home.</li><li>Act fearful or overly shy&nbsp;around others.</li><li>They grow up with&nbsp;low self-esteem.</li><li>Have difficulty in social gathering due to a&nbsp;lack of social skills.</li><li>More likely to have symptoms of&nbsp;depression and anxiety.</li><li>Poor academic performance&nbsp;due to mental tolerance.</li><li>Lack of creativity&nbsp;as they are afraid that they might go wrong.</li></ul> This generalization appears to apply across a variety of cultures. Kids from authoritarian families may find it more challenging to fend for themselves and make friends. Pros of Authoritarian ParentingOften strict and rigid, authoritarian parents expect their kids to follow the rules at all times. But there are some good things about this parenting style. Good behaviour -&nbsp;Children have a good understanding of what is and isn't acceptable. They are also highly attuned to the negative consequences that can stem from wrong behaviour, so they will avoid stepping out of the line.Safety -&nbsp;Authoritarian parenting places a strong emphasis on safety, which minimizes the types of risky behaviour a child may engage in.Goal-driven -&nbsp;As per the standard of living in this style, children can understand what steps need to be taken to accomplish a goal. Cons of Authoritarian ParentingThis parenting style may lead to symptoms of depression and anxiety. There are several other cons of authoritarian parenting that should be considered if you're adhering to this type of child-rearing. Rule-dependent-&nbsp;A heavy emphasis on rules set by parents without any real explanation, makes children feel insecure and unsure of how to behave in specific scenarios or social gathering.Reduced self-esteem-&nbsp;As choices are limited, child skill development and creativity are limited, which may have a direct impact on his or her self-esteem. Children who depend on others to develop their confidence will often struggle in social situations or new environments.Rebellion -&nbsp;Children eventually grow tired of the seemingly endless list of rules without any discussion. Children then start to defy the rules and risk their safety eventually intentionally.Emotionally withdrawn -&nbsp;Children who are raised by authoritarian parents tend to shy away from expressing their emotions as Parents do not entertain questions or make an effort to understand the child's emotion.

When parents practice tough love parenting, they adopt a parenting style that psychologists call authoritarian parenting. Find out if this parenting style is right for your child.

authoritarian parenting parenting concerns

Parenting issues are a part of the everyday parenting journey. Following article(s) might help you with your concern(s).

Authoritarian parenting

More like this

Bee Suggestions

About Bee