If your child is laughing without any specific reason or if (s)he is talking, crying or staying silent way too much without any understandable reason, this might indicate that your child is unable to understand what is going on in a particular situation. When children have insecurity of being judged as someone who cannot gauge what is going around in his/her space, they react in a way in which people around them are not able to catch the fact that the child is not understanding anything happening around him/her. From the child’s perspective, (s)he feels, "Come on! I don’t get it. Why do you want me to understand everything”. They choose not to be vocal about how they feel. So they keep reacting in odd ways. Sometimes children are scared and think "If I go say that I don’t understand this and ask again, my parents will get angry and scold me.” You need to analyse the scenarios in which your child laughs too much. Ask you this question - Is this situation particularly funny and laughable or is my child just acting oddly because of (s)he lacks understanding of the situation? If you feel that your child lacks understanding, talk to them in private and ensure them that you are there to understand them and not mock them or be angry at them. Reassure them that if they don't feel right about anything, they can come to you and talk to you; there will be no judgements. If things are out of control and you cannot help manage your child's behaviour, you should consult a child psychologist who can help you solve this problem by taking steps in the right direction.

Pay attention to the situations in which your child laughs too much; this will help you to understand the problem better.

When a child laughs too much

Pay attention to the situations in which your child laughs too much; this will help you to understand the problem better.

Are we exhibiting what we want our kids to be? Call it a harsh reality but children rarely learn from what we preach, they learn from our actions. Take this for an example, an anonymous user on the internet confessed that her child would hit her younger sibling while playing. Her explanation in defence was, “We are playing ‘mommy”. We all aspire to become perfect parents for our kids because we want to inculcate values in them that would make them better human beings. But the larger and the more significant question is do we exhibit that kind of discipline in our behaviour? We expect our children to use modern-day gadgets judiciously but do we supervise our use of these products? We want our kids to watch their words and actions when angry but do we manage our anger appropriately? We want our kids to show decorum and discipline with their daily routine but are we exhibiting ourselves as an example to do the same? Dr Haim Ginott, a renowned child psychologist, pointed out, “Children are like wet cement. Whatever falls on them makes an impression.” If we give the child an environment of hostility he is more likely to learn to fight. An environment of ridicule and shame can lead to the child resulting being shy and guilty. But similarly, if the child had always lived with tolerance, he learns to become more patient. If he has always received praise, he learns the virtue of appreciation. What is important during the child’s growing years is that we model the kind of behaviour we expect our children to be. It is impossible to not be stressed or angry under circumstances. But when the parents manage their stress and anger appropriately, the message is loud and clear to the kids that it is normal to feel negative at times but it is only the positive attitude towards solving these problems that reap good results. Parents should ‘speak’ and ‘do’ what they expect out of their children. Saying statements like. “I love all kinds of food”, “I love playing outdoors”, “Let’s clean up the mess together”, “Let’s help little brother/sister with eating the food”. These kinds of statements bring about assurance in the kids and before indulging in the wrong they are forced to do what think what they have been taught. The brains of children are like sponges. They absorb everything without discriminating information into right or wrong. Let's set ourselves as better examples for our children. Let's exhibit what we want our children to be.

Are we exhibiting what we want our kids to be? Call it a harsh reality but children rarely learn from what we preach, they learn from our actions.

Children See Children Learn - The pillar of parenting

Being a positive role model for your child can help instil the right attitude and habits from an early age for your child to nurture a healthy lifestyle.

Children See Children Learn ~The pillar of parenting

Before guiding your child towards the spiritual path, accept it in your life first. Children can feel when parents fake something. So it is important to be completely true to what you believe in before nurturing your child’s spiritual side. Developing spirituality is a lifelong journey towards self-discovery. What is spirituality?The dictionary defines it as being concerned about the human soul and spirit as opposed to physical and material things. It does not matter in which religion you believe. It is important to believe in the energy that is greater than us. Spirituality is developing life values like gratitude, compassion, sharing, acceptance, faith, etc. Being spiritual is respecting life, respecting the rights of others, and appreciating the environment. For example, teaching ‘sharing’ to children is important; be it sharing their toys with other children or sharing their time and energy with elderly people. It is important to let our children know how these actions make other people feel good. Not to mention when we help others, we are truly helping ourselves. Spiritual kids are happier and healthier and have a better sense of values and morals.Spiritual well being leads to fewer chances of anxiety and depressive symptoms. Spiritual well being also leads to emotional well being in children. There is no particular age when you can start instilling spirituality in your children. You can teach your babies and toddlers too. At this age, they might not understand it mentally but they will feel the energies, vibrations, and love and will know that this is a state of being. Here are a few ways to nurture your child spiritually:<ol><li>Set an intention:&nbsp;First thing in the morning have everyone in your family set their intention for the day. Have your children state their intention, for example, their intention for the day could be something like: I intend to be mindful in school today, or I intend to have a happy day.&nbsp;At the end of the day, ask them if their day turned out as they intended it to. If not, ask them where it went off track and what they could have done differently.</li><li>Gratitude journal: Make it a habit that everyone in the family writes down at least one thing they are grateful for every day in the evening. It can be anything from being happy for being alive to thanking another family member for something they have done for them. Alternatively, if you as a family eat dinner together, have everyone at the dinner table state what they are grateful for.</li><li>Guided visualisation: Children are visual learners so guided visualisations or meditations work great. Guided visualisations can create healthily, thought-provoking images to transform negativity into positive affirmations. Guided visualisations provide relief from stress and anxiety, decrease panic attacks, boost self-esteem, and provides opportunities for children to connect with themselves on deeper levels. Guided visualisations are best to use before bed so as to calm your baby down and put them in the space to have good dreams.</li><li>Martial Arts:&nbsp;As odd as this sounds, martial arts actually emphasises self-control, respect, and compassion. Apart from teaching self-control and discipline, martial arts boosts self-esteem and confidence, it provides a tool to channel anger. It is also a great exercise</li><li>Yoga:&nbsp;Yoga brings about inner peace, is a good way to increase children’s awareness of their own bodies, aids their sense of balance. It also reduces stress and lowers anxiety levels in children.</li><li>Arts and Crafts:&nbsp;Arts and crafts provide children with the opportunity of being creative and use their imagination. Hence, art and craft is great way to explore spirituality. Art also helps children in expressing their deepest feelings for which they don’t have the words to say out loud. Children tell the truth through their art.</li><li>Explore nature: Exploring nature helps in self-discovery. You can teach several aspects of life using the elements of nature. For example, you can teach your children about transformation by talking about butterflies; teach them about the interconnectedness of life by talking about ecosystems while hiking in the forest; teach them about conservation by picking up trash wherever you are; take them for stargazing. There are endless ways to teach children about the universe and its place in it through the exploration of nature.</li><li>Community Service: Volunteering for a community service project can provide children with a broader understanding of how they fit in the world. It helps them develop compassion and empathy for others and find gratitude that their own circumstances are different from others.</li><li>Encourage your child to share his or her dreams with you: By showing a genuine interest in your child’s dreams, the child will learn to value them. Encouragement to share will build their self-confidence and in turn create an optimistic and cheerful approach to life. By encouraging a child to share aspirations we are ultimately supporting them in believing and achieving them.</li><li>Listen to your child with full attention and concentration: When children try to communicate but aren’t heard and honoured, they try to guard their feelings over time and keep to themselves most of the time. Take time out to sit and listen to your child’s joys, achievements, frustrations, and dreams.</li></ol>

Children can feel when parents fake something. So it is important to be completely true to what you believe in before nurturing your child’s spiritual side. 

Nurturing your child's Spirituality

Spirituality keeps one grounded and helps an individual live an emotionally and mentally content life.

Nurturing your childs Spirituality

Parenting is a process, not a learned behaviour. Raising a child in a nuclear family requires several measures, the most important of all being the sharing of responsibilities between both the parents equally.<ul><li>Children in a nuclear family are more confident as they are more independent compared to children raised in joint families.</li><li>A joint family offers a lot of family time, so parents in a nuclear family should properly schedule their day to assure sufficient and efficient time for kids in the family.</li><li>Being in a nuclear family brings many responsibilities on parents’ shoulders. This might drain you out, more if you are a working parent. This draining out will make you frustrated sometimes but it is very important to stay positive in front of your parents. The serious discussions can be limited to bedrooms between you and your spouse.</li><li>If you live in a nuclear family, it is important to maintain good ties with the extended family. This is because they will be at your help to look after your child when you cannot be present for your child.</li><li>Instead of relying on gadgets, invest in educational play boxes for your child which will aid your child’s intellectual development.</li><li>Involve your kids in household chores. Nothing can be a better way to spend quality time with your kids. This also develops emotional, motor, social skills in your child.</li><li>Make sure to plan outings – even to the nearest park – once in a while. This will help you ease a bit and also give your child the time to bond with you.</li></ul> In the end, it is up to parents to weigh the pros and cons of raising a child in joint and nuclear families and then decide what’s best for their child(ren).

A nuclear family or elementary family or conjugal family is essentially a family which has parents (mother and father) and children.

Parenting in a nuclear or conjugal family

A nuclear family or elementary family or conjugal family is essentially a family which has parents (mother and father) and children.

Parenting in a nuclear family

A few things said in haste messes up a child's brain and have a considerable impact psychologically, like low self-confidence, self-doubt, anxiety, depression, and so much more. Throughout your parenting journey, make sure you are not saying things or acting out in a way that could damage your child(ren) mentally. Sometimes parents are not aware that their actions affect their child(ren) negatively, and sometimes parents overlook it and justify their bad behaviour due to their stress. Here are a few practices which you should avoid telling your child(ren): Pick these up right now. I don't want you leaving a mess like that again.Instead, say:&nbsp;I don't like this mess you are leaving. Can you please clean this up when you have time? You should know better.Instead, say:&nbsp;It's OK not to know some things. Here, I will help you out. You're a bad kid.Instead, say:&nbsp;Can you tell me why you behaved/acted in such a way? I feel it wasn't right, is there anything you want to talk about? Or Else.&nbsp;Example: Eat dinner, or else you won't get your dessert.Instead, say:&nbsp;How about you take a healthy dinner quickly so that we can all enjoy dessert together?&nbsp; Stop being shy.Instead, say:&nbsp;You can come to say hi to your aunt when you are ready. You should set a good example for your brother.Instead, say:&nbsp;Your brother looks up to you; you're such a good role model. Wait until your father/mother gets home.Instead, say:&nbsp;You're grounded because you said a bad word. I will never forgive you.Instead, say:&nbsp;What you did was not acceptable, but we can look past it and move on if you think the next time. I'm ashamed of you.Instead, say:&nbsp;Although I feel bad about what you did, I love you for who you are. Don't worry; everything will be OK.Instead, say:&nbsp;Mom and Dad are always nearby, and we're going to set up a plan in case of emergency. Here, I'll do it.Instead, say:&nbsp;Let's do it together!" Don't cryInstead, say:&nbsp;I know you're sad, and it's OK to cry. It's OK to let out your emotions. Let me hug you. If you don't clean your room, you're going to be in big trouble.Instead, say:&nbsp;When your room is clean, then you may go out to play. Family finances aren't your business.Instead, say:&nbsp;Finances are how we make and manage money, and when you like, we will teach you what we know. I'm disappointed in you.Instead, say:&nbsp;I'm surprised and was not expecting this to occur. Come here, NOW.Instead, say:&nbsp;It's almost time to go. Do you want one minute or two? Because I said so.Instead, say:&nbsp;Explaining why you feel a certain way about something. We can't afford that.Instead, say:&nbsp;We're not going to buy that because we're saving our money for more important things. Don't talk to strangers.Instead, say:&nbsp;What would you do if a man you don't know offers you candy and a ride home? OR If anyone makes you feel sad, scared, or confused, you need to tell me right away. You should listen to adults.Instead, say:&nbsp;You need to listen to your parents. Don't be greedy!Instead, say:&nbsp;Would you please be kind and share your toys with your friend? Who taught you this? (about mischief)Instead, say:&nbsp;Why did you do that? Look at this lovely girl.Instead, say:&nbsp;I love you. You can do this too. I do everything for you.Instead, say:&nbsp;We do things for you because we love you, so please do for me. Do I have to tell you this 100 times?Instead, say:&nbsp;I've told you this before, but could you please. That's only for boys/girls.Instead:&nbsp;Say nothing at all. Try your best at raising gender-neutral children. You live under my roof, so you follow my rules.Instead, say:&nbsp;You know the household rules. Please stick to them. That's how I was raised.Instead, say:&nbsp;I don't think it's a good idea to do [ ]. Even my parents used to tell me that [ ]. You're just like your mother/father!Instead say:&nbsp;I’m not happy with [ ] because [ ]. I told you so.Instead, say:&nbsp;I'm sorry to hear about [ ] ... let this be a lesson. It's just a little white lie.Instead, explain to them that it's OK to use white lies to be polite and not hurt someone's feelings. Explain to them the fine line between lies and little white lies. Man up. / Be a man.Never disregard your son's feelings. Don't teach them that showing emotions is weak. To show emotions is only human. Why can't you be more like your sister?Instead, say:&nbsp;I don't quite like this behaviour of yours. Do you think we can work on it? If you loved me, you wouldn't do (this/that).Don't teach them that love needs to be proven all the time. Love comes without ifs and buts. I wish you'd never been born. / I hate you.No matter how angry you are, this is the worst thing to say. You would be scarring your child. Why can't you do anything right?Instead, say: What's the barrier? Is there anything I can help you with? I don't believe you.Instead, say: This comes as a shock for me. But I am sure you can tell me the whole thing. There's nothing to be afraid of.Instead, say:&nbsp;Everyone has their fair share of fears. We appreciate that you shared your feelings with us. We promise we will work on this together. You're lazy/stupid/selfish.Never label your child. Never. Your friends don't do that.Comparison will never bring any positive change. Accept your child for who they are and appreciate them. You should have done better.Praise them for their achievement. Do not over expect. You don't know what you're talking about. / You're too young to know what you want.Often children know what they want or how they feel. Saying this will show your distrust in their feelings. You'll never be able to do that.Instead, encourage and push your child to do better, of course, without any comparison. You're so fat/skinny, or You're going to get fat/skinny.Never attribute a child's identity to their looks. You make me so mad.Calm your anger down, and then talk to your child(ren).&nbsp;Instead, say:&nbsp;We will talk about this after a while when I am in the right state of my mind. Impact of such phrases on children:<ol><li>Antisocial behaviour</li><li>Poor resilience</li><li>Depression</li><li>Aggression</li><li>Lack of empathy</li><li>Difficulty in relationships</li><li>Self-doubt</li><li>Lack of self-confidence</li><li>Anxiety</li></ol>

A few things said in haste messes up a child's brain and have a considerable impact psychologically, like low self-confidence, self-doubt, anxiety and so on

Speaking Gently: Things you should never say to your child

A few things said in haste messes up a child’s brain and have a huge impact psychologically.

Things You Should Never Say to Your Child

Samiksha Choithani

Getting the baby out of the cradle gets challenging, especially when the child gets comfortable in the cradle. However, it is important to get them on the bed or in a cot. This is how you can break the habit of cradle: <ul><li>Make the child sleep on the lap, keep the lap moving until the child sleeps, slowly make them sleep on the bed. If the child wakes up often, do not give up. Repeat this process for three to four nights and the child will get habituated to bed.</li><li>You can make the child sleep in the cradle but once the child is in deep sleep, pick him/her from the cradle and make them sleep on the bed. If the child wakes up, don’t repeat the process. Cuddle them and make them sleep on the bed only.</li><li>Try to reduce the motion of the cradle for a week and make the child sleep on the bed every alternate day, stick on this routine for a week.</li><li>Make sure any of these patterns are to be strictly followed to break the habit of the cradle. Children will get cranky and it will get even more difficult to handle them during sleepless nights but it will only be a matter of a week or 10 days and your child will enjoy a normal sleep habit.</li></ul>

Babies love to sleep in cradle because the swaying of cradle is soothing to them.

Breaking the cradle sleep habit

Palak Vyas

Qualities to look for the right cradle: <ol><li>The base of the cradle should be wide and sturdy so that it doesn’t topple and fall.</li><li>The distance between the slats should be appropriate, not too wide that the baby’s fingers or head get stuck in it.</li><li>Choose a cradle that has a sturdy mattress. It should be firm and well fitted. In case if the cradle doesn’t come with a mattress, you can buy it separately. Soft mattresses increase the risk of SIDS.</li><li>Choose a cradle with a fair and reasonable price as you are going to use this for a few months only. So buying an expensive and fancy cradle is a waste of money. The only criterion here is to buy a cradle that is comfortable to use, strong and reliable.</li><li>Check whether it meets the safety standards for design, structure, usage etc.</li><li>Select a cradle that has an automatic swing option; it relieves much of your work of swinging the cradle every now and then.</li><li>Get a cradle with either lockable wheels or no wheels at all. The cradle should be steady all the time.</li><li>These days cradles come with lullabies and music stored in it. It can be a great help to you.</li><li>Ensure it is portable and flexible enough to be travelled with.</li><li>The height and design of the cradle should be comfortable as you will have to pick up and put the baby back for n number of times. So look for your convenience.</li><li>Avoid cradles that come with sleep positioners. Sleep positioners may pose as a suffocating hazard.</li></ol>

A cradle is a baby bed with curved bases so it is easy to rock them from side to side.

cradle parenting concerns

Parenting issues are a part of the everyday parenting journey. Following article(s) might help you with your concern(s).

Breaking the cradle sleep habit

Selecting a cradle for your baby

Bee Suggestions

About Bee