If your child is laughing without any specific reason or if (s)he is talking, crying or staying silent way too much without any understandable reason, this might indicate that your child is unable to understand what is going on in a particular situation. When children have insecurity of being judged as someone who cannot gauge what is going around in his/her space, they react in a way in which people around them are not able to catch the fact that the child is not understanding anything happening around him/her. From the child’s perspective, (s)he feels, "Come on! I don’t get it. Why do you want me to understand everything”. They choose not to be vocal about how they feel. So they keep reacting in odd ways. Sometimes children are scared and think "If I go say that I don’t understand this and ask again, my parents will get angry and scold me.” You need to analyse the scenarios in which your child laughs too much. Ask you this question - Is this situation particularly funny and laughable or is my child just acting oddly because of (s)he lacks understanding of the situation? If you feel that your child lacks understanding, talk to them in private and ensure them that you are there to understand them and not mock them or be angry at them. Reassure them that if they don't feel right about anything, they can come to you and talk to you; there will be no judgements. If things are out of control and you cannot help manage your child's behaviour, you should consult a child psychologist who can help you solve this problem by taking steps in the right direction.

Pay attention to the situations in which your child laughs too much; this will help you to understand the problem better.

When a child laughs too much

Pay attention to the situations in which your child laughs too much; this will help you to understand the problem better.

The following tips will help you manage your twins/triplets efficiently: <ul><li>Stick to a schedule</li></ul>Maintain a common schedule for the children. If one wakes up from a nap, wake up the other. If one is hungry and wants to eat, feed the other child as well. Scheduling both the children together will keep you sane and help you get proper sleep as well. <ul><li>Feed at the same time</li></ul>It is important to learn to breastfeed both babies at the same time. If you are feeding on the bottles, it is easier to have two spots to seat them. Breastfeed or bottle-feed, prepare ahead of the feed (a breastfeeding pillow, bottles, burp cloths, pumped breastmilk or formula and a snack for yourself). After feeding, burp the babies one by one. By the time the second (or third) baby has been fed, burped, and changed, the first one's often hungry - and the cycle begins all over again. In the beginning, breastfeeding two babies at the same time can be difficult. It is best to consult a lactation nurse on the days when you are still in the hospital. A nurse will help you try different breastfeeding positions so by the time you are home with your kids, you can apply the one that suits you and your child the best. When one of the babies wakes up to be fed in the middle of the night, wake up the other one after you're done with the first baby. It's hard to wake a sleeping baby, but if you don't, you will be constantly tending to babies and not getting any sleep. <ul><li>Bath twice</li></ul>Bathe your babies turn by turn. If you have an infant chair, put one of your babies in the chair beside you while you bathe the other child. When you are done with one baby, switch the places. Bath seats are also available in the market; these seats make the bathing process easier. <ul><li>Know who is who</li></ul>In the early days of twin parenting, it is natural to mix up your babies. You can dab a dot of nail polish on one of your baby's toes or fingers to avoid confusion. You can tie a wristband to one of your babies. See what works the best for you. <ul><li>Crying times two</li></ul>More often than not, both of your babies will cry at the same time. It is difficult to find out what soothes your babies. What works for one might not work for the other. Figure out if cuddling, cradling, singing, caressing works for your babies or not. <ul><li>Share the duties</li></ul>Ask for help; it can be difficult but ask away. It will be for your own peace. Delegate your tasks to your spouse or your other family members. You can hire a caretaker as well for some time till you figure out how to go about twin parenting. Delegating your tasks will give you time to bond with your babies. Communication is the key; if you feel one parent is taking up more responsibilities, talk it out. <ul><li>Preparing your house for your babies</li></ul>Baby proof your house in every possible way. Set up a changing station including diapers, wipes, and extra baby clothes. If you have a house with more levels, make sure to arrange changing stations, baby chairs at all levels. That way you can avoid running up and down the stairs every time one of the babies spits up or needs to be changed. <ul><li>Bond with your Babies</li></ul>It might take you more time to bond with your babies compared to parents of singletons. Most of your time will be eaten up in fulfilling your babies' needs. But the more time you spend with your babies, the more you will know them and connect with them. <ul><li>Celebrate their individuality</li></ul>It's important to treat your babies as individuals so that they begin to see themselves that way too. Refer to them by their names rather than as "the twins," and as they get older, make sure they have their own clothes and special toys. <ul><li>Plan quality time individually</li></ul>Plan quality time separately for your babies. Sit and talk to them, read a book, or play a game with your babies. The goal is to give each child life experiences that are fun and appropriate for them. Twins are very dependent upon each other in the early years. Spending some time apart will help them develop separate identities and help them understand their likes and dislikes. <ul><li>Respect your children</li></ul>Every child has different needs hence it is important to cater to their individual needs than being fair when raising twins. It is okay if you don't buy the same gifts or clothes for your twins or treat them in the same manner. Respecting the similarities and differences of each child fosters a real and healthy sense of self. <ul><li>Consider possessions &amp; twin identity</li></ul>Possessions help children form a sense of identity. Some separate clothes, toys, books, blankets, etc. reinforce separateness and ownership. Each child needs some possessions that do not have to be shared. This can be achieved by giving each child a special cupboard or space on a shelf. <ul><li>Be cautious about making comparisons.</li></ul>The comparison comes naturally to parents, knowingly or unknowingly. With twins, it becomes even more tempting to do so. Every child develops at their own pace hence it is best not to compare twins. Comparisons easily discourage a child or create a situation where (s)he feels less smart, capable, attractive or loved. What to invest in and what to save on?Babies Can Share:<ul><li>Changing table</li><li>Playpen or portable crib</li><li>Baby bathtub</li><li>Nursing pillow</li><li>Breast pump</li><li>Baby monitor</li><li>Double or triple stroller</li><li>Stationary activity centre</li><li>Activity mat</li></ul> Separate Baby Needs:<ul><li>Car seat</li><li>Infant seat</li><li>Bassinet</li><li>Crib</li><li>Swing</li><li>Diaper bag</li><li>High chair</li><li>Front carrier</li></ul>

It can be a little tricky to raise twins or triplets. But with time, you sure will figure out everything. The following tips will help you manage your twins efficiently.

Parenting hacks by experts on raising twins

It can be a little tricky to raise twins or triplets. But with time, you sure will figure out everything.

Are we exhibiting what we want our kids to be? Call it a harsh reality but children rarely learn from what we preach, they learn from our actions. Take this for an example, an anonymous user on the internet confessed that her child would hit her younger sibling while playing. Her explanation in defence was, “We are playing ‘mommy”. We all aspire to become perfect parents for our kids because we want to inculcate values in them that would make them better human beings. But the larger and the more significant question is do we exhibit that kind of discipline in our behaviour? We expect our children to use modern-day gadgets judiciously but do we supervise our use of these products? We want our kids to watch their words and actions when angry but do we manage our anger appropriately? We want our kids to show decorum and discipline with their daily routine but are we exhibiting ourselves as an example to do the same? Dr Haim Ginott, a renowned child psychologist, pointed out, “Children are like wet cement. Whatever falls on them makes an impression.” If we give the child an environment of hostility he is more likely to learn to fight. An environment of ridicule and shame can lead to the child resulting being shy and guilty. But similarly, if the child had always lived with tolerance, he learns to become more patient. If he has always received praise, he learns the virtue of appreciation. What is important during the child’s growing years is that we model the kind of behaviour we expect our children to be. It is impossible to not be stressed or angry under circumstances. But when the parents manage their stress and anger appropriately, the message is loud and clear to the kids that it is normal to feel negative at times but it is only the positive attitude towards solving these problems that reap good results. Parents should ‘speak’ and ‘do’ what they expect out of their children. Saying statements like. “I love all kinds of food”, “I love playing outdoors”, “Let’s clean up the mess together”, “Let’s help little brother/sister with eating the food”. These kinds of statements bring about assurance in the kids and before indulging in the wrong they are forced to do what think what they have been taught. The brains of children are like sponges. They absorb everything without discriminating information into right or wrong. Let's set ourselves as better examples for our children. Let's exhibit what we want our children to be.

Are we exhibiting what we want our kids to be? Call it a harsh reality but children rarely learn from what we preach, they learn from our actions.

Children See Children Learn - The pillar of parenting

Being a positive role model for your child can help instil the right attitude and habits from an early age for your child to nurture a healthy lifestyle.

Children See Children Learn ~The pillar of parenting

Kids tend to avoid healthy food due to the high taste levels of junk food. These activities will be a great help to develop their interest in food:<ul><li>Take them for grocery shopping.</li><li>Cook and Bake with them; there is nothing more exciting than this.</li><li>Teach them gardening - grow foods in your backyard.</li><li>Place the food on the plate in the colours of a rainbow; this way you can include all sorts of food on your child's plate. The easiest way is to prepare a food salad or a vegetable salad.</li><li>Hide vegetables and fruits in an opaque box or carry bag and ask the child to close their eyes. Then ask them to put their hand inside the bag, pick up food, feel it and then try to identify the vegetable/fruit through its texture. You can do this activity separately for vegetables and fruits to make it easier for your child.</li><li>Food obstacle course activity. Design an obstacle course in your house where you place different fruits/vegetables as obstacles. The child will have to eat a small portion of that vegetable or fruit before advancing forward. You can carry out this activity in a group and it will be a lot more fun.</li><li>Weave a story around fruits and vegetables and narrate those during their mealtime; check out food-related stories on our app.</li><li>Sing them songs/rhymes about food; you can a few songs related to food on our app.</li></ul> Keep in mind:<ul><li>Do not give them screens during mealtime; this way they will know what they are eating and will appreciate the food on their plates.</li><li>Let them have their favourite snack or dessert once in a while. But do not use them as treats for eating the food that they like less.</li></ul>

Thinking of interesting ways to present food to your child(ren) will make them eat all types of food.

Activities to encourage and develop child's interest in food

Thinking of interesting ways to present food to your child(ren) will make them eat all types of food.

Activities to develop your child interest in food

A few things said in haste messes up a child's brain and have a considerable impact psychologically, like low self-confidence, self-doubt, anxiety, depression, and so much more. Throughout your parenting journey, make sure you are not saying things or acting out in a way that could damage your child(ren) mentally. Sometimes parents are not aware that their actions affect their child(ren) negatively, and sometimes parents overlook it and justify their bad behaviour due to their stress. Here are a few practices which you should avoid telling your child(ren): Pick these up right now. I don't want you leaving a mess like that again.Instead, say:&nbsp;I don't like this mess you are leaving. Can you please clean this up when you have time? You should know better.Instead, say:&nbsp;It's OK not to know some things. Here, I will help you out. You're a bad kid.Instead, say:&nbsp;Can you tell me why you behaved/acted in such a way? I feel it wasn't right, is there anything you want to talk about? Or Else.&nbsp;Example: Eat dinner, or else you won't get your dessert.Instead, say:&nbsp;How about you take a healthy dinner quickly so that we can all enjoy dessert together?&nbsp; Stop being shy.Instead, say:&nbsp;You can come to say hi to your aunt when you are ready. You should set a good example for your brother.Instead, say:&nbsp;Your brother looks up to you; you're such a good role model. Wait until your father/mother gets home.Instead, say:&nbsp;You're grounded because you said a bad word. I will never forgive you.Instead, say:&nbsp;What you did was not acceptable, but we can look past it and move on if you think the next time. I'm ashamed of you.Instead, say:&nbsp;Although I feel bad about what you did, I love you for who you are. Don't worry; everything will be OK.Instead, say:&nbsp;Mom and Dad are always nearby, and we're going to set up a plan in case of emergency. Here, I'll do it.Instead, say:&nbsp;Let's do it together!" Don't cryInstead, say:&nbsp;I know you're sad, and it's OK to cry. It's OK to let out your emotions. Let me hug you. If you don't clean your room, you're going to be in big trouble.Instead, say:&nbsp;When your room is clean, then you may go out to play. Family finances aren't your business.Instead, say:&nbsp;Finances are how we make and manage money, and when you like, we will teach you what we know. I'm disappointed in you.Instead, say:&nbsp;I'm surprised and was not expecting this to occur. Come here, NOW.Instead, say:&nbsp;It's almost time to go. Do you want one minute or two? Because I said so.Instead, say:&nbsp;Explaining why you feel a certain way about something. We can't afford that.Instead, say:&nbsp;We're not going to buy that because we're saving our money for more important things. Don't talk to strangers.Instead, say:&nbsp;What would you do if a man you don't know offers you candy and a ride home? OR If anyone makes you feel sad, scared, or confused, you need to tell me right away. You should listen to adults.Instead, say:&nbsp;You need to listen to your parents. Don't be greedy!Instead, say:&nbsp;Would you please be kind and share your toys with your friend? Who taught you this? (about mischief)Instead, say:&nbsp;Why did you do that? Look at this lovely girl.Instead, say:&nbsp;I love you. You can do this too. I do everything for you.Instead, say:&nbsp;We do things for you because we love you, so please do for me. Do I have to tell you this 100 times?Instead, say:&nbsp;I've told you this before, but could you please. That's only for boys/girls.Instead:&nbsp;Say nothing at all. Try your best at raising gender-neutral children. You live under my roof, so you follow my rules.Instead, say:&nbsp;You know the household rules. Please stick to them. That's how I was raised.Instead, say:&nbsp;I don't think it's a good idea to do [ ]. Even my parents used to tell me that [ ]. You're just like your mother/father!Instead say:&nbsp;I’m not happy with [ ] because [ ]. I told you so.Instead, say:&nbsp;I'm sorry to hear about [ ] ... let this be a lesson. It's just a little white lie.Instead, explain to them that it's OK to use white lies to be polite and not hurt someone's feelings. Explain to them the fine line between lies and little white lies. Man up. / Be a man.Never disregard your son's feelings. Don't teach them that showing emotions is weak. To show emotions is only human. Why can't you be more like your sister?Instead, say:&nbsp;I don't quite like this behaviour of yours. Do you think we can work on it? If you loved me, you wouldn't do (this/that).Don't teach them that love needs to be proven all the time. Love comes without ifs and buts. I wish you'd never been born. / I hate you.No matter how angry you are, this is the worst thing to say. You would be scarring your child. Why can't you do anything right?Instead, say: What's the barrier? Is there anything I can help you with? I don't believe you.Instead, say: This comes as a shock for me. But I am sure you can tell me the whole thing. There's nothing to be afraid of.Instead, say:&nbsp;Everyone has their fair share of fears. We appreciate that you shared your feelings with us. We promise we will work on this together. You're lazy/stupid/selfish.Never label your child. Never. Your friends don't do that.Comparison will never bring any positive change. Accept your child for who they are and appreciate them. You should have done better.Praise them for their achievement. Do not over expect. You don't know what you're talking about. / You're too young to know what you want.Often children know what they want or how they feel. Saying this will show your distrust in their feelings. You'll never be able to do that.Instead, encourage and push your child to do better, of course, without any comparison. You're so fat/skinny, or You're going to get fat/skinny.Never attribute a child's identity to their looks. You make me so mad.Calm your anger down, and then talk to your child(ren).&nbsp;Instead, say:&nbsp;We will talk about this after a while when I am in the right state of my mind. Impact of such phrases on children:<ol><li>Antisocial behaviour</li><li>Poor resilience</li><li>Depression</li><li>Aggression</li><li>Lack of empathy</li><li>Difficulty in relationships</li><li>Self-doubt</li><li>Lack of self-confidence</li><li>Anxiety</li></ol>

A few things said in haste messes up a child's brain and have a considerable impact psychologically, like low self-confidence, self-doubt, anxiety and so on

Speaking Gently: Things you should never say to your child

A few things said in haste messes up a child’s brain and have a huge impact psychologically.

Things You Should Never Say to Your Child

Samiksha Choithani

Like adults children also start exploring their behaviour at different ages. But like adults, children don’t have words to express their emotions; they are just discovering different ways of behaviour in order to influence people. So tantrums are just method of expressing feelings for children, all we need to do is try and understand what is happening around them. Tantrums cannot be totally avoided but of course can be controlled. Take the following steps to cope with your child's tantrum issues: <ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Ensure the child is not stressed – if the child is tired, hungry or stressed he/she may experience tantrums.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Identify the sources that lead to tantrums, for e.g. If your child is experiencing tantrums when you are involved in a conversation, try to hold it for a moment and listen, in case you are avoiding it might trigger and lead to a frustrated behaviour. Next, time when you have a long family conversation, ensure you have a book to read or some colouring assignment for a child to keep them busy.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Distract your child and don’t try to be rebellious when the child is experiencing tantrums. Just try to change the environment or start a new activity.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Just try and talk about the feeling, encourage them to name the feeling. For example if the child throws a toy, ask them why did they throw? It wasn’t working? What could have been done? And what could be the consequences of throwing it?</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Keep calm, take time (a minute) to control yourself first before reacting to the situation. If you get angry, situation can be hard both for you and your child.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Be consistent in your approach, if you give a phone to child during meals when the child experiences tantrums and sometimes you don’t, things can get worse.</li></ul> Note: Once the child turns 5, tantrums may considerably reduce as they develop an understanding of consequences of their behaviour. You can explain them immediately or at night in the form of a story.&nbsp;

A child is bound to throw a tantrum because who else if not the child. This does not mean the tantrums can not be tamed.

tantrum thrower parenting concerns

Parenting issues are a part of the everyday parenting journey. Following article(s) might help you with your concern(s).

Dealing with Toddler Tantrums

More like this

Bee Suggestions

About Bee